Saturday, 14 February 2009

grumpy bear

see that fred with the bad nose, well he is grumpy as h**l i can tell you.

i am going to buy him a huge box of kleenex today so he can keep his nose clean.

it is valentines day and the ted crew are preparing a party. there is only one female amongst us, gwendoline, and she really does not cut the mustard in the fancying department. however, we must make the best of what we are given. and as we have been given gwendoline, we will do our utmost to woo her.

i am taking her out to supper, fred (when he has finished tidying up his stuffing) is going to buy some sparkley wine, panda is just going to look at her lovingly with his dark brown glass eyes, thankfully he still has two of them, even though is stuffing is loose.

i just have to decide where gwendoline and i can go for our supper. fred suggested our local chippy, but i feel gwendoline might feel it a bit beneath her. after all she is a faded film star and has starred with wallace and gromit many years ago.

i could of course easy jet her off to sunnier climes, and feed her oysters and champagne on a deserted beach somewhere, although at the moment i do not have enough spondulicks for such a treat. also i may be spotted on the plane by the evil easy jet air crew and be kidnapped once more for their wicked sales purposes.

i will report back.

however, in the meantime, bear with me. well of course, there are always bears with me.

i will think of something i am sure. happy valentines day to any bear looking in.

remember bears, one day we will rule the world.

easy jet bear ;0)

bear ess

as you can see gwendoline is pretty p****d off with having to date with me, and she is also pretty p****d off with fred, he has what we call "tissue issues", however i wanted you to see us all in party mood, as far as this lot can party.

although i have to admit i rather admire gwendoline's cute but rather fixed grin.........

and she is more than a maggie thatcher at the handbagging!

Friday, 13 February 2009

First past the post

well we have made it.

escaped from human dominance and made our first ted crew mark on the blogging world.

allow me introduce the ted crew.

i am easy jet bear with the orange t-shirt. i was purchased on a budget airline plane - one of those airlines where you have to buy your peanuts and your vodka and tonic, plus take a deep breath on landing.

panda - the grubby looking toy to the left of this photo. he is ancient, possibly 50 years or more old. even older in ted years.

in the vase, we have fred, he also is possibly geriatric too. his nose is disgusting, and gives me the barf what with all the straw coming out of it. constantly.

behind him, gwendoline, a faded film star. who also needs to get a good hairdresser.

the evil dolls you can see at the back are sworn enemies of the ted crew however they insisted on getting in on the photo because they want world domination too.

and they are pretty scary.

well that is the ted crew introduced. this is also our first post.

we intend to dominate not only the world but possibly the universe. we also want total abolition of capital letters. they are truly the work of the devil.

personally i would like to see the abolition of straw stuffing for bears and pandas, however this may be too much to ask.

i hope you can follow our world domination adventures, once we can squeeze gwendoline and fred outta the vase of course.